Are you feeling hurt and frustrated that despite how much work you’ve put in, life is not working out the way you thought it should?

You’re not alone, and I urge you to keep hope. All of us have a still, quiet voice of Wisdom within us, and we need to give it the space to speak.

Sometimes it’s simply about timing.

Show notes

[0.27] Some perspective on this current emotional rollercoaster? Everything you’re feeling is normal!

[02.15] A story of (and a lesson in) Timing.

[04.43] The voice of Wisdom, and how to use it to make peace with Timing.

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Quotes from this episode

"One thing was clear and comforting -  the emotional roller coaster that I was feeling, was shared by all." - Lisa Linfield

“Every one of us was feeling a greater level of, let’s call it ‘Swing’, from feeling great and happy for the quieter and slower pace . . . to feeling down and introspective.” - Lisa Linfield

“All of us have a still, quiet voice of Wisdom and we need to give it the space to speak.” - Lisa Linfield

"Be gentle on yourself, and know that Wisdom’s truth is always there for us." - Lisa Linfield

"Sometimes it's just about timing." - Lisa Linfield

Transcript

Hello everyone and welcome to today’s episode of Working Women’s Wealth.

I was recently in a great session facilitated by a Brene Brown Certified Dare to Lead Facilitator, Kim Potgieter. There were around 100 financial advisers and we broke into online groups of around 8 people and shared our experiences of these last 7 weeks of lockdown. 

One thing was clear and comforting -  the emotional roller coaster was normal. To put it in perspective,  I was the only woman in our group, so this couldn’t be written off as female hysteria.  Every one of us was experiencing a greater level of ‘swings’ – from feeling great, and happy for the quieter and slower pace (despite all working really hard given we deal with people’s money which is under pressure); to feeling really down and introspective as to how our economy, clients, friends and ourselves will get through the massive financial upheaval.

I have two main businesses – my wealth management company and Working Women’s Wealth. Like everyone, money is tight and I’m battling at the moment to justify continuing with Working Women’s Wealth. My biggest frustration is how long its taken to build… and how much money it consumes along the way.  

The last time I seriously struggled with Timing was in my late 20s. It was a few months after I had broken up with my boyfriend, and was renting a room in another person’s flat in London.  I returned from my run and was stretching in this person’s lounge when my eyes rested on the spine of a big white book. It’s title was “When God Cries”.

To this day, I still have no idea what was in the book, but I remember clearly my conversation with God like he was in the room with me as I stretched.

“God, all my friends are getting married, and here I am single. I know you see how heartbroken I am, how lonely and alone I feel, and I know that you are able to bring me someone NOW! If you see how this breaks my heart, and you cry for my pain, why don’t you just bring me that person now?”

The picture I saw was of two roads -  a low, gentle road, and a higher road that went to the sky. Yes, God said, I can bring you someone now, but it wouldn’t be my perfect person for you.  You would have a life not as great as the one I have planned for you – the low road.

I have someone for you, and you will have a great life. But I’m still preparing you and him, and neither of you are ready yet. So whilst I see your pain, and it breaks my heart that you’re unhappy, I don’t want to give you the low road life now when I know how much better a life I have planned for you.

As I look at John and my three gorgeous girls, in hindsight I’m delighted God’s rubber arm couldn’t be twisted so easily. I’m glad he stuck to his plan, and my desperation didn’t lead him to give me the second choice option. And I’m glad I didn’t take matters into my own hand and accept the earlier marriage proposals when I knew in my soul they weren’t right.

This time in my life feels very similar.

I’ve worked so hard on my businesses, and I feel that for the dedication and hours I’ve put in, Working Women’s Wealth should be a lot further down the line. I know I’ve made so many mistakes, and if I was to do it again, I’d do SO many things differently – it’s why I started Business School for Startups – or the side hustle.

But it feels like it should be easier by now.

In my book I talk about the importance of tapping into Wisdom. Whenever our fight or flight response kicks in, or our emotions get the better of us, to tap into that little gentle voice of Wisdom in our souls. For some, it’s the Wisdom of their grandma, for others it’s their Higher Self or Universe, for some it’s God. But all of us have a quiet voice of Wisdom that we need to give it the space to speak.

As you all know, my main way of thinking is through journaling. My brain is too all over the place with too many things going on to be still enough to hear the Still Small Voice. So I force myself through a thinking routine I describe in my book, that makes me look at all elements of the problem, and then forces me to write down what Wisdom would say.

Right now, Wisdom tells me I’m right back in that London Flat, stretching, having the same conversation with God. That he does have a plan for me and my business, and that it is a high road to the sky. But he’s not finished preparing me for it, or the other people on the road. Yes, he could give me ‘instant success’, but that would be a low road, as I wouldn’t be ready to receive it yet, and couldn’t make it fly.

So if you’re going through one of those reflective times, and are hurt and frustrated that despite how much work you’ve put in, life is not working out the way you thought it should, I’m here with you. And I urge you to keep hope – like we discussed two weeks ago. Be gentle on yourself, and know that Wisdom’s truth is always there for us, to gently love us and bring us through these times.